Working at any job will have you come face-to-face with difficult people. Most times you bite your lip, hold your attitude, and bear it through as best you can while trying to make the person as happy as possible. Sometimes these "difficult people" come in at bad moments for yourself and are simply high maintenance and require a lot energy to handle (e.g., people who want 2 items in this bag, 3 in this bag, and make sure you double-bag one of the bags). Occasionally, you have a person who doesn't speak English as his/her first language and you have a language barrier and they become difficult because they don't understand. Other times, they generally are difficult to work with and you can't please them no matter what you do (e.g., people who want said items to be bagged in such a way, but you don't do it correctly so they want you to do it again). And then, from time to time, they are sour-minded people who find the world is out to get them and, thus, must treat everyone in a negative manner to make themselves feel better or, in general, they just are rude and intolerable with a chip on their shoulder and feel like they can treat you badly for whatever reason. I'm sure there are more types of difficult people, but mine generally come down to the aforementioned four: 1) I'm tired, 2) language barrier, 3) they're simply picky, or 4) they have a serious attitude issue no matter what.
My questions, though, are why is it that difficult people are the ones who get to act out and get away with it? Why is it deemed "not okay" to be difficult, rude, obnoxious, etc, but we as a society still tip-toe around these people? Why can't we just hit them upside the head and tell them to snap out of it and stop being rude? Why is it when someone sees a portion of a moment with the difficult person (especially if it happens often) does it make you seem like the bad person when you look like you're running out of patience?
I suppose all the answers really come down to confrontation (re: don't like it) and tolerance (re: being the bigger person or accepting it), but they're still fair questions. Why can't I tell a customer to exit the premises without helping them if they're being difficult beyond the realm of tolerance? Okay, so everyone's tolerance levels are different and what is deemed "difficult" is different than someone else's, but, you know, there is a general "level" that most people can agree to. Honestly, where has human decency gone?
I suppose the question to that is: Has there ever been a moment we can say human decency existed on a general level? We as a society do change (e.g., perception of women and African-Americans) and hindsight is 20-20, but you wish there's at least a general level that we can be civil to each other. Unfortunately, apparently that doesn't really exist on a macro-level. Sure, maybe on a micro-level (i.e., person-to-person) it does exist. I'm courteous to my neighbors. I'm helpful to the elderly on the street. Yet, when it comes down to it, how often does it crop up that we question human decency?
This is all mostly just rhetorical thoughts bouncing around my head and you're probably wondering where this all came from. Let's just say that I have had a very (make that a double-underline) trying week (thank goodness tomorrow is my Friday!). What's happening to the world?!
Twice in the last couple of weeks we've had customers come in with a chip on their shoulder from the get-go (difficult person #4 in my earlier list). One lady, for no apparent reason, was really rude to a co-worker (no fault of the co-workers). On top of it, she was a really picky person (difficult person #3). I had to deal with her later and you couldn't even make small talk without her trying to chew my head off and then bagging was difficult nonstop (one in each bag, tie the bag - no, wait, I want to tie it myself - place them gently in the bigger bag, etc). I at least had a heads up about her so I was trying to play it down, but I guess she had a little bit of a cussing episode before I got to her. Then, today, Oh.My.Gosh. The guy threatened a co-worker bodily harm (BEYOND the "normal" realms of difficult person #4)! Who does that?! All over a $20 return! He came in fuming too. The manager got it calmed down (did the return, despite our policy) and then the situation was blown up again. It was like verbal abuse the names he called my co-worker (not the manager) and then threatened us. Yeah, not cool. I hope he never comes back and what are we supposed to do? Act cool and get him out of the store as quickly as possible, while the rest of the shoppers are fidgeting (practically) because of the confrontation (who wants to shop with a guy like that in-store?!). Goodness. Human decency, people, HUMAN DECENCY.
And our favorite difficult person #2 who has been coming in each and every day for the last 1.5 weeks or so. We're pretty much all convinced that she DOES understand English, but plays dumb to try and get us to work around her (to be fair, I KNOW she understood me MUCH better several months ago). At first, we were all nice (she used to come in every few weeks before the recent everyday situation) and she'd come in with her daughter or husband and it wasn't too bad. Lately, it's been bad and VERY bad. Bad to the point of making customers uncomfortable because we sound like we're being mean and/or rude to this older lady who (to them) doesn't understand English. We're not being mean. We're not being rude. Yes, we're being firm with her over our store policies, but it's because she's taken advantage of us enough the past week and we're tired of dealing with it (not to mention we have very long conversations over the same thing everyday...). We've even had customers (a regular) get herself involved because she thought she could help. Yeah, it doesn't. We all basically want to run away when we see her come in, it's that bad. One day she wouldn't leave after I said "no" to her a bazillion times and we threatened to call the cops if she didn't take "no" for an answer and leave (she knows what "no" means for sure and suddenly understood what "calling the cops" meant too). Funny enough, the next customers to come up made a joke of it (it made us all laugh) and they asked how often she came in so they understood why we weren't being nicer or more lenient, but most people don't know the situation. So, in a lot of eyes, I feel like we're seen as the mean guys because we're holding to our policies because this lady keeps taking advantage of us. We're a charity, people, we're nice, but you can't try and take advantage of us everyday and get away with it! Where's the human decency in this situation?!
Truly, no one likes difficult people. I get that. I get that they exist in the world too, but WHY do they need to come around me?! *sigh* As I said, it's been a rough week with difficult people (especially our favorite customer who doesn't speak English...). Ironically enough, I was dealing with the lady who doesn't speak English (another round (after my earlier round) of explaining the same thing that we explain everyday...) and had to go up to the register with her when the whole ordeal of the beyond difficult guy was happening. So the manager and assistant manager were BOTH busy with difficult people, albeit totally different levels. In addition, I had a customer waiting for me to help her, furniture arrived, etc. It was a crazy half hour. After both difficult people left, we had a customer standing in line after the whole thing and I apologized to her profusely and rang her up. Luckily, she was a really nice lady and we actually started talking about Borders, but...man.
I feel so embarrassed to have people like that in-store. It's like you want to tell every customer in-store during the situation that you really are nice people, there aren't these difficult people in-store, generally, and your shopping experience will usually be pleasant! I think the stigma with Goodwill also doesn't help the situation either. Being at a place like Goodwill means people are friendly to you (it's like a neighborhood establishment/family feel with the regulars compared to Borders when you felt all stiff even if they were regulars), but it also means people can think of your store as being "cheap" or "dirty" or has "crazy people" frequent it (won't deny the crazy people, but Borders had crazy people too!). So, yeah.
Difficult people? By far. Human decency? Not so much from them. I'm just glad my week is almost finished. I'm not sure I can take anymore difficult people and the odds of our favorite non-English speaker coming in tomorrow is quite high. Hopefully it's just her and no one else...
In another line of human decency, today I saw a dog get picked up by animal control. It broke my heart. The dog was so friendly that the initial cop on the scene (there were 2 and they were arresting some guy - not sure if the dog was his or not) walked up to it and the dog immediately wanted to be petted and then wanted to play. It was funny because the dog had a crazy minute of running around a nearby tree. I have no clue what led it on, but it was funny. The dog was so happy and really pretty (Shepard-collie mix maybe?). Apparently, it was initially tied up to the tree it was running around because the animal control person (after putting a noose-like leash on the dog) went back and dug around and came up with what looked like a leash (as the cop had the dog). I hope someone didn't tie the dog up and leave it there. I (mostly) hope that the guy who got arrested owned the dog just because at least the dog wasn't abandoned on purpose...It might have been the case too because the animal control person went and talked to the guy through the window of the cop car afterwards. The guy didn't look seriously in trouble, but they did pat him down, cuff him, and went through his belongings and then some other cop showed up in a "community services" truck. No clue. It was weird, but I hope the dog is okay.
With that...
[/rant] ;)
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